The Trombonist

To Josef…and his Mother

The tall young teenage man

Stood straight and soaring

Among his peers.

Wearing a Black bowtie

And a crisp white shirt

And holding a golden Trombone.

The drumbeat began

And that tall young

Teenage man

Began

To play that trombone.

There were two trumpeters

A tuba

And a French horn

But the trombone filled

The gym

With the warmth and grace

That could only come

From within

That tall, proud, young teenage man.

He was playing the trombone

Not just with his fingers,

And not just with his mouth,

But with his whole soul.

His smile dazzled the building,

As though a star had fallen

Upon the street outside

And he had been

The first to see it

Shine.

He was no longer

Just another teenager.

He was a star.

His mother craned her neck

To meet my eyes

And said with becoming pride,

“See why I’m so proud

Of my son?”

NAKED

I cannot tell you how badly

I want to be absolutely

Naked.

Cast away all my shame

And all my fear

And become pure

And beautiful.

Becoming the man

I always knew I was.

The clothes that itch

And the shoes that barely fit

No longer serve me

Any purpose.

I want to wander away

Someplace safe and loving.

Into the bosom of nature.

Here I would shed all of my

Clothing

And all of my

Trappings.

I would be as naked as

The trees

Surrounding me.

I want to be naked.

And I want to scream.

Long, loud, and hoarse.

So I can let go of the anguish

Of the world that I have left behind.

God, just to be naked.

Free of constraints

And prying eyes.

To be whole

And unashamed

And finally, firmly

Fearless…

open arms

Tenatively, the baby stands on her feet.

She looks around, and wonders who is there

For her to walk to.

Just in front of her, the baby

Finally finds someone—

Her Mother.

She kneels before her proudest achievement,

Clapping her hands and opening her arms.

Baby’s tiny brain, growing every second,

Knows one thing for certain—

Love is waiting.

And so Baby smiles to Mommy

And she takes the first steps.

One foot advances toward the other,

Uncertainly at first,

Then with greater sureness.

Baby instinctively picks up the pace,

And Mommy’s heart swells with pride,

Like a great big balloon.

Baby finally makes it

Into Mommy’s tender embrace.

And her face says it all.

“I did it, Mommy! And I’d do it again.

And again, and always.”

I walked to my Mommy in the exact same way.

And so did my sister.

And now she calls herself Mommy.

And for as long as she lives,

Baby will walk, then run, then stride

Into Mommy’s open arms.

WAKING UP

I woke up first thing this morning

And I found myself placing great value

On my own breathing.

Lying there.

Drifting in and out of the dream state.

Wiggling my bare toes and

Deliciously uncovered feet.

Valuing and reveling in

Each and every breath I took.

I wondered why I had not mastered

The art (I know there is one)

Of taking longer and deeper ones.

Wishing I could make it all

Last longer.

Enjoying being supine

And supple.

Loving being in my body,

In the moment,

In my glory and in my power.

And then I realized it was

Time to shower

And snap out of it all.

Realizing that soon I shall have to

Leave my cocoon

And join the world

Where you are not supposed to

Feel yourself breathe.

Where you wish time would go

Faster, not slower.

Where you cannot value your breath

As much as you are supposed

To value your clients.

We were not born

So that we could live

Like that.

My breath tastes so much sweeter,

My skin feels so much better

When I have nothing to lose.