COLLEGE FOOTBALL (It’s all the same to me)

The helmets, the balls

The plays and the calls

It’s all the same to me.

The fields, the marching bands,

The students in the stands.

Indistinguishable across the land.

The big men in their pads and helmets

And the little men in zebra stripes

Running up and down and all around.

Raging middle-aged men with headsets

Screaming themselves hoarse.

Nothing better to do on a Saturday, of course.

Commentators in the booths and on the fields

With little imagination to wield.

Shouldn’t these kids be in class

Studying and trying to pass?

I assume that’s why they’re there.

And here’s one extra point—

For some of these grizzled young men,

It’s either the gridiron

Or the joint.

College football is such

A screwball game.

Better to throw fastballs

And make that Hall of Fame.

Shouldn’t they be passing knowledge and wisdom

And not pigskins

In College?